The "skinny" on Skinny Jeans

Let me start this blog entry by admitting that I am not a fashionista. I don't follow trends religiously, nor do I keep up with what's "in" or "out". I feel that trends if acknowledged at all, should be used as a guideline. Not a religion that you absolutely must stick to no matter what.

Enter the "skinny" jean.....

I really think there should be a weight limit on these bad boys. I can't tell you how many times I've seen heavy women (and men!) wearing these pants. They simply aren't flattering on heavy people. I don't understand why one would wear pants that make them look like Humpty Dumpty. I really don't! Maybe that sounds bitchy of me to say, but come on now. I'm not a skinny minnie myself. I've got curves and accept the fact that although these pants may look cute on petite/slim/toned people, I have no business in them. I am not about to pour myself in some jeans that could pass for leggings just because it's the trend. I wish more people would accept the fact that certain styles of clothing aren't flattering to their body types. It does give me something to laugh at, but I'm sure they wouldn't like to know that people such as myself laugh at the fact that they made themself a fashion victim. What reeeeeally gets me is when gals have trucker gut and wear these pants. It's as though the pants are cutting off the circulation to their lower body therefore causing their upper half to bloat! Perhaps these folks are proud of their flapping guts and like it to wiggle in the wind. I don't know. I'm puzzled. Help me understand this!

Another thing that gets me is men who wear skinny jeans. I think a lot of men have skinny legs and I had no idea that this was a turn on to some women. I mean, that has to be a reason why they wear them, right? Yuck. I think it's borderline vulgar when men wear skinny jeans. Their marble bags get all squished in there and it's disgusting to see. I've been traumatized by this sight way too many times to mention. I think this madness of men in painted on jeans needs to stop! If you're chunky these pants will not magically make you skinny. If you're a man, these pants will mangle your manparts. PUT THE SKINNY JEANS BACK ON THE RACK!